Kneeland Swingers in California

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Polyamory - three (or more)-way RELATIONSHIPS - Hey Halfbaked, We have been in a quad relationship for 2 1/2 years with another couple we met as Swingers. There have been ups and downs, but we are all happier than we have been in our whole lives and we are all closer and more in love with our spouses than ever before. I think it works so well because each marriage has been 20 years plus and the other wife and I(I'm the Mrs) are Bi and in love as well. I would just caution you when it comes to introducing your children into this type of blended family. We live within walking distance of our BF & GF, but have chosen not to disclose the full details of our "friendship" to our children(ages 8 & 15) because we feel that it is hard enough to grow up nowadays under the best of circumstances and other people can be cruel and judgmental. I would not want my child to suffer in any way because of my lifestyle choice. I am not against blending families, it is just not something we are willing to risk. My biggest piece of advice would be to listen to others' advice objectively, but only do what is right and best for YOU and YOUR loved ones because every relationship is different and different things work for different people. Just always be completely honest and open with one another and discuss everyone's feelings whether they are good or bad. Good luck to you guys! You may want to search on Meetup to see if there is a Poly group in your area.

How Often Is To Often ? - how often should a couple have sex with each other ? - Most of the time no one could accuse us of being swingers, but maybe one a year the play time desire gets overwhelming and have at it. Otherwise it's a matter of convenient timing. I hope we're not the only ones.

On Premise Swingers Club - SLC - I've been to a few really fun swingers clubs in other states and there needs to be one here!! Randy of (Randy and Haylee)

Kik group for UT swingers. - Contact me if your interested in joining a KIK group for Swingers - We would like to join as well, Kik- Mhstms8404

Swingers Club - Swingers Club - It comes with egg rolls, but onion rings cost you extra. I knew I shouldn't have recycled the damn clipper.

KUTV News Story on Swingers - News - Yep! We have seen couples dicorce. If you are not 100% in love and sole mates that can date togather then maybe you better check out Ashley Madison or contact your ward bishop! I love my Bob and enjoy our friends and every experience we enjoy or laugh about togather. We like what we like and if you don't like us!!!! Well you are probably needing a little therapy! Lol

I Have A Question - Poly vs. Open - Mr. and I have been in a committed poly relationship with another couple for 3 1/2 yrs. Both we and the other couple had been in the LS for 3-4 years before this. Our trajectories were different - Mr. and I were pretty bored with swinging. We had lots of fun adventures, but we both tend to crave more intimacy and I, in particular, don't find myself attracted to many men until I am intellectually attracted to them, and that generally takes more time and effort than the average swinger wants to put in. We had tried only dating unicorns for a year, and then went to more of an open style marriage (infrequent, but occasional hall passes. Sometimes with both members of the same couple, sometimes not). But even that wasn't as satisfying as I wanted and my interest in the LS was waning. That's when we stumbled upon our Others. We were at a vanilla swirl party (a few LS, mostly vanilla) and immediately picked them out as LS. What do you know, we clicked. I immediately was drawn to the husband, he to me, and our spouses soon felt the same. We began spending time together as a foursome pretty much from that day forward. Their trajectory was different than ours. They were classic swingers--meet at a party, click, arrange sex or fuck then and there. Sometimes these people became friends over time, sometimes not. They didn't crave the intimacy we did; they enjoyed the spontaneity, excitement and variety. Their relationship was never open. No hall passes, almost always straight partner swap with another couple, but occasionally they would mix that up at a party situation. So it's kind of surprising that they ended up down this road of polyamory. We just clicked and loved every minute with each other and really never have wanted to be apart. HOWEVER, we are all four still swingers in some way or another. It has become more apparent after the honeymoon phase has settled into a deeper, more real relationship. They occasionally still want that exciting fling. We do too, only less often as the stars REALLY have to align for me. Mr and I still occasionally like sex with a deeper connection. There have been moments when we resented their desire for casual sex. There have been moments when they resented our need for deeper connection. But in the end, like any LS couple, we were able to talk it through. And we were able to realize how all of us can be fulfilled and have our needs met. We just had to drop the jealousy and insecurity and really want to please the people we love.

Single Males - - [quote=CTA313][quote=EVILDOERS] ...get a girl to join you....Not only do you now "bring more to the table", but you have the added credibility that if you can find and finesse a girl into joining you in this little adventure we call swinging (whether it be a girlfriend, a wife, a second cousin twice removed, or just a hot fwb) you might just not be a giant douchecopter.[/quote] Ignoring the need to "finesse" someone and unhealthy gender stereotypes in general, this line of reasoning is a little troubling as it presumes that a male's company is inherently worth less. Or that an absence of semi-romantic relationships somehow speaks poorly of his character. I personally think approaching someone whom you aren't already fairly close with and soliciting to go to a swingers party is a bit out of line. Especially if her company is sought as an accessory to demonstrate to others that he is not, as you say, “a douchecopter”. Call me old-fashioned. [quote=EVILDOERS] I know we can't be the only people who secretly wonder just a little bit about some single guys and why they aren't with somebody. Do they secretly hate women (yes, we've met some that actually do), are they just too lazy (or busy, maybe...but hey, we're all busy) to find someone, are they serial killers and/or just not very nice guys? [/quote] Oh, I hope you are! That's a really unfortunate outlook to have. Promising relationships take time to find, let alone build to the requisite amount of trust and stability to try things like this. In the mean time, I don't see anything wrong with someone pursuing their interests while still holding out for someone worthy of their emotional investment. To me, that behavior is quite attractive should be respected! It doesn't get any better than someone who is confident, self-actualized, and motivated to pursue their desires. Sadly, it sounds their gender influences whether this is seen as a desirable trait. I'm not sure how long you've been out of things (30 years?), but it's easy to forget the struggle when you're comfortable in a marriage. Things are more fluid. People don't feel the need to settle down like they used to. [quote=EVILDOERS]I know many will say they've tried and swinging is a deal breaker for most women. After almost 3 decades in the swinging trenches meeting and talking to other people, both couples and singles, we would disagree....many, if not most, women could eventually come around to the idea of swinging once they feel safe and secure in a relationship.[/quote] This is just confirmation bias if the evidence comes from a sample of people you have met while swinging. [quote=EVILDOERS]...those of us who DID put in all the blood, sweat, and tears into a relationship and allow it to grow to the point of daring (don't think for a second we aren't risking a LOT in opening up our relationships to other people!) to allow others access to our significant other sometimes wonder why some others want to take a shortcut to all the sweet swinging bennies with little or no risk on their own part.[/quote] If you're not comfortable sharing your wife with someone you might view as a potential competition, you definitely don't have to. On the other hand, there are a lot of people enjoy it :) This smacks of the old “you must suffer as I did” chestnut. [/quote] Yes, I agree, "finesse" was a poor choice of words. In my defense, I was at work and rather in a hurry to make a point...that apparently I didn't make well (and my attempts to also be humorous apparently fell flat too). Rereading my post it does smack a little of mild gender bias but I can assure you that it wasn't my intent in any way and most certainly is not my outlook on women, relationships or life in general. My intent was simply to advocate approaching swinging as a mutually desirable activity that two partners desire and share equally in. And not that it matters, but I've shared my wife with probably over a hundred men, married and single, and I've never thought of any of them as competition. But I never thought of swinging as "sharing" my wife either, but instead as her deciding to be sexual with another person and me being totally okay with her decision to do so. Sharing her, to me, almost denotes some sort of ownership or at very least some kind of permission that I would have to give. Both those ideas are not a part of our relationship. Perhaps the concept of "competition" in swinging interactions is a single male attitude? I don't know. And I didn't mean it in any way, shape, or form as a "you must suffer as I did" trope but simply as the idea that we invested a LOT of hard work and time making our marriage what it is and together deciding to risk opening it up to the excitement and also the possibility of harm that is swinging. I think, perhaps, that sometimes single people in the lifestyle don't quite understand the very real possibility of permanent damage (or worse) to the relationship that couples who swing are flirting with. For many (most?) of us, our marriages/relationships are THE most precious thing we have. What, if anything, are you risking? A bruised ego?

Why swingers are happier. - - Damn - I have seen some great screaming smiles - and I know it makes me happier :-D

Swingers of Color - - Just a quick comment on this..we have found that to be the same in Toronto(we have NY on our profile)but live just outside Toronto..most clubs we visit are 95% white. xoxox Jodi