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BDSM and Swingers? - Where does BDSM fit in the swingers' world... your thoughts and experiences? - Our experience (almost 30 years in the lifestyle) is that the kink community and the swinging community don't mesh all that well. Sure there are some swingers who are into BDSM but by far most people who practice BDSM aren't swingers and more than a few actually look down on swingers (funny, if you think about it) for having consensual sex with multiple partners (with or without whips and chains).
We've dabbled in very light BDSM a time or two and found that it DEFINITELY isn't our thing and other than maybe a little spank on the ass during doggy style sex it isn't the thing for about 99.9% of the swingers we've met.
But look around a bit and you'll find a few swingers who like to play act BDSM on occasion and perhaps even a few who actually practice it as a lifestyle along with their swinging.
Question - do you talk about other swingers? - No utfun your not wrong at all. Some times when people start talking (without name dropping) not meaning anything bad just an experience, other people will say things you dont want them too. Lesson learned here feelings get hurt and that sucks , so we just stopped talking about anything but good in people. Mr and Mrs tart
A paradigm shift - polyamory - Your thoughts? Here are mine... - Hitting the topic of Poly.... I am poly my wife is not. We swing. I have a lady friend, spice if you will who is also married and her husband is not poly and they do not swing. We, all 4 of us are fast friends and both my wife and her husband have no problem with her's and my arrangement. THey also know that We swing. Now how did that person come into our life.. we met and became friends almost immediatly. I fell in love with her but am sill "IN love with my wife as well. I< we, like to become friends with people before we jump into the sack with them... BTW they both know that we swing. Could I fall in love with another woman, definitely.. Could I fall for a woman who we might swing with....I could and have. No biggy...If she is not into that I understand... Not everyone can handle the situation
Some one mentioned that jealousy are natural.... Only in the sense that by example we are programmed to them, just as we are not "taught " not to eat other people but we kind of get that impression...Canibalism(sp) is not acceptable any more than is marrying ones own sister or brother. Possessiveness is about owning somthing that is not yours to own. No one owns anyone else and especially not their spouse. Is it natural to own a person? I say no. Somehow when people get into a relationship the idea creeps in that says that the other person is your exclusive property. One need to put that aside if one is a swinger. As for jealousy.... Jealousy is a combination of both possessiveness and ones own insadequacies. Maybe one could describe that as fear.. Fear that she or he will meet someone better. Fear that we are not good enough, etc etc etc. So Jealousy is a reaction to these fears and the possessiveness not a true emotion at all. Everyone thinks of Jealousy as an emotion, which it is not.
So polyamory is very possibly with swinging but may purists of poly will say that poly and swinging are difinitely two different things... Maybe but they can exist simultaneously.
Just a note; More than 60% and I've seen figures up to 77% of all married couples, and I'm sure that it extends to LTR's as well...maybe even swingers, are at some time in their life engaged in serial monogamy..; i.e., either cheating or getting ready for the split-up. Isn't this a simpler form of or something like poly? ... THink about that....
Sexy swingers closer to our age - 20-30 year old sexy swingers - We are in our 20s, 25 and 29.
Breaking the 4th wall - meeting a swinger in a vanilla situation. - [quote=FUN4MWF]Rather than jump on the bandwagon and agree with everyone all teenie-bopper style, I'd need more info. Did you articulate in your email EXACTLY who you are, as in your real name and job and how you knew them and the specific circumstances that allowed you to recognize them?[/quote]
Basically my e-mail was:
"Hi, I'm James, the male half of Blueidkat, I work as a sales rep for a national beverage company and consequently call on a lot of retail locations along the Wasatch Front. The other day I was at Blah business in Blah City and noticed someone who looks a lot like you. I know with all the swingers in Utah I must bump into some, everyday, and not realize it. It was so cool to possibly recognize a lifestyler out there in the vanilla world and just wondered if I was right."
I understand the whole fear of being stalked and the need for anonimity but are we that afraid? Do we need to be?
Utah Meetup group - - [quote=COUPLEFORFUN1115]Maybe everyone bring a box on unicorn ceral as you ticket in!!![/quote]
Rookie mistake... you may need to review our extensive post on “swinger and unicorn bait”...the cereal is what unicorns EAT, not a swinger identifier...upside down pineapples in a grocery cart and black rings is the universal signs for swingers. Perhaps a clinic on such things is in order?🤔 Unicorn Whispering (Trapping 🤫) and Swinger Signaling 101. 😉
What if??? - Some body's worst night mare. - 1. I know someone else in my family that are swingers. Not my parents although I highly suspect they have engaged in such activities in the past.
2. I have run into various family members (siblings, cousins, etc) at m&g's and parties. Awkward for a minute and then we laughed it off and we have the understanding that we don't out them to others and they don't out us to anybody either. Although technically my mom knows anyways as I've had random discussions with her in the past.
We never ran and hid. Its handled tactfully. We try to keep our personal sexual adventures private in general and its understood that "keep your mouth shut around family and friends that dont know and we'll do the same." It works.
MRS_ROCKZO
New Swingers Club in Utah - Gauging interest in new club - We would definitely come when the wife is in town from work. Sounds like a great idea. Sounds like david and Marie are right on point.
please be careful - - ...interesting comment from another site....
"Older folks swinging their way to STDs ..... older "swingers," ... are at high risk for chlamydia and gonorrhea" sounds very alarming, until you read the details and consider other factors.
"10.4 percent (risk) of swingers being infected ... compared with 14 percent of gay men, 10 percent in straight people who did not swing"
Really? Only a 0.4% increase over straight..." That's NOT a comparatively high risk.
In "... the over-45 population, they found 55 percent of the diagnoses for chlamydia and gonorrhea occurred in swingers, versus 31 percent in gay men" - This is meaningless without more data, such as the comparative size of the populations.
" The study authors hypothesize ...." Yeah, a lot of hypothesis and little to back it up. The only worthwhile line in this article is "...researchers recommend swingers be tested for common infections like chlamydia and gonorrhea regularly and practice safe sex."
Hot wife - - "My Saturday job involves quite a few liberal athletic co-workers..."
Damned socialist swingers wanting FREE sex handouts! [em]Emo_84[/em] LOL
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