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Slowing Things Down - An argument for taking your time. - That's a lot.... did ya'll cramp up typing this? Whew ! On the topic, we are always friends first... it makes the actual play much better ( in our own humble opinion ) [quote=DELICIOUSLYWET]A nice, slow, buildup might be ideal. In the vanilla world, the buildup often begins long before the first date. You meet a co-worker, or a fellow student, or someone who you see at the coffee shop, and there is some immediate attraction, and eventually you connect on a more physical level. If we are hoping to make those sort of connections, within the swinging lifestyle community, then we are going to have to find a way to run into lifestyle people frequently, and casually. If there is no, or limited opportunities to just run into swingers, enough to build relationships like that, then the way we end up meeting is through dating. If you are swiping right and you are vanilla dating, online, if there is shared chemistry and attraction, you will have a second date and so on and so forth. If the chemistry is super hot, even in the vanilla world, people sometimes fuck on the first date. If the sexual intimacy was superb, that might just accelerate the depth of the shared communications, the amount, and the quality of the time together. The way we see it, if there is some super hot chemistry, on a swinging date, if sexual intimacy happens, the same sort of acceleration in the relationship might happen. It might not. If it doesn't and the sex was good, well, good sex beats mowing the lawn. For us, we raised five kids, who all grew up to be happy, healthy successful adults. All but one of our kids have significant others. Some have kids, which makes us grandparents. Our kids and our grandkids, really like us, love us, and we really like and love them, so we spend a lot of time together. We have friends from work and friends from the neighborhood, and we have jobs. Seriously, dating, at the level we dated, when we were wooing each other, in terms of time, well we just don't have it. If non-monogamy was the openly celebrated norm, and friends openly fucked each other, as a normal part of a friendship, then we would all just naturally end up in those sorts of relationships. Well, except the assholes. Assholes don't flow into meaningful relationships. They take advantage of people's vulnerabilities and loneliness. Manipulation isn't friendship. Demanding people, who wish to break you into the vision of their expectations don't want to be your friend. No give, just take. You'll never be able to give them enough. You owe them nothing, and yet, they will shame you for not giving them exactly what they want when they want it. If we can all just avoid the assholes, then what we do get to share with good caring people, is a privilege and for lack of a better term, a blessing. Good people, reaching out, accept and defend each other's vulnerabilities, even if that means some disappointment and patience, and that takes an honest caring person. Sexual desire honestly expressed is surrounded with vulnerability, and romance even more. I changed subjects there for a moment. Since what swingers do is considered taboo, as a social norm, then that leaves dating. Let's face it. Dating is hit and miss, when it comes to making a lasting connection. When four people are involved dating becomes maybe a bit more complicated. We are not apposed to the slow burn buildup. If we meet someone and there is a spark, that is the motivation. If there really is a nice shared spark, and they want to jump ahead and build the fire, we probably won't say no. [/quote]

KUTV News Story on Swingers - News - [quote=DELICIOUSLYWET][quote=CHEFFETTE][quote=DELICIOUSLYWET]Gasp! Tens of thousands of swingers here in Utah. I believe Utah now has a slightly higher-than-average divorce rate. The national divorce rate is 3.4% with Utah slightly higher at 3.6%. The percent of divorced residents in Utah is reported as 9.3% which is the 18th lowest in the nation. Don't ask me how those numbers reconcile. It has something to do with immigration into the state I am guessing. New Jersey reports that 8.5% of it's residents are divorced and that is the lowest in the nation. Well what do you think? Did more than 3.6% of all the swinger couples, that you have met end up getting a divorce? Was it over swinging? Are more than 9.3% of the swingers population divorced? This would include all the singles now swinging that were once married. One woman telling the media how swinging ended her marriage is anecdotal at best. Do I believe she is telling the truth? Yes I do. Do I personally believe swinging ads an extra element of jeopardy to a marriage? Yes I do. Do I believe there are quite a few people that would be happier staying away from the swinging lifestyle? Yes I do. Never-the-less, most of the couples, we have personally met, that are swingers seem to enjoy swinging and frankly enjoy doing it together. Do I believe there are quite a few couples who will enjoy swinging? Yes I do, we certainly have enjoyed the lifestyle experience as do a lot of swinging couples we have met. In the end if you are a married couple you have to make the decision based on the two of you, as to whether or not swinging is a good thing in your lives individually and as a couple. As for statistical models as to the divorce rate within the community of swingers well there aren't any. This isn't really a news story it's sensationalist journalism designed to attract viewers. Anyway, the divorce rate has been going down since the 1980s and swinging has been on the rise since the 1980s so you could make an analogy that swinging is saving marriage. Yes it would be a bunch of anecdotal bull shit just like this story. [/quote] Right. And swinging doesn't end a marriage anymore than cheating or lying or alcohol abuse or drugs, etc; people end marriages. Any relationship is an invention solely created by those people involved and only they have power over its progress forward. Will swinging or discussions about it lead to problems between people in relationships? Potentially. But any attempt by the anonymous lady in the story to blame swinging for anything is an attempt on her part to avoid accountability. You can't blame the alcohol itself for the drunk. PS, NJ may have a lower divorce rate b/c it's one of the few states that still grants annulment instead of divorce in certain cases.[/quote] And I thought it was all that Frankie Valli music and strolls along the Jersey Shore that rekindled the romance in Jersey nuptials. [/quote] "Oh Frankie, it's so magical when we go down the shore and watch the waves bring medical waste in!"

Cupled MEN - Info - It's not just a Utah thing. But this site has it the most since couple v single males for a lot of us old time swingers we've learned to adapt to the changes screen all request piture or not and weed out the not real head gamers to where others still think its couples only hobby.

BiCouple2018 - Texas Swingers? - You'll have my screen name from this message. My FWB's handle is kitkat1168 we can't travel to college station, but possibly could meet you folks in Houston when when you go there. We are available either together or as singles. I have a lot of experience in MMF & MFM 3somes. She is a newbie, but ready for anything. She especially wants to get into the FF action and get ears deep. I excel in that area as well. Sessions should be measured in hours, not minutes.

Meeting new swingers? - Where to meet them? - we meet most on the net... but our friends have a monthly meet and greet party... about 300 to 400 show up its a great way to meet new friends. For those who are interested the link is http://www.secretdesires.org/

ARE THE LIFESTYLE SWING COUPLES MORE SPIRITUALLY INCLINED - - Thank for your other responses to my other aquestion. Now we pose the ? are swingers more spiritually inclined than str8 couples. What do you think and why?

911 THE REAL TRUTH - - sawit a while back and am thoroughly pissed about the entire thing you never know who to believe or trust. canada is looking better and better but didnt they outlaw swingers ?

We thought this was educational and should explain a lot about s - keep an open mind. Swingers are spiders. Each to their own unique ways! - Hahahahaha

How to find other swingers - - If we're in a crowd of people and we want to find others, we wear our shirts that say "We love the lifestyle". The words are not in big bold letters across the front and back of the shirt and on a mens shirt they appear on the left chest and on women's they appear across the middle of the shirt. To most straight couples they wouldn't even know nor pay attention since the words are not just "out there" - they are tastefully done. BUT - others in the lifestyle will pick up on them immediately.

swingin - thought this site was a swingers site - jstjim did your mother help you with that comment TR him or her u make me laugh i start the post with a question now u and jst jim and virgin r trying to make me look like the bad guy it is to funny..... lmfao this all started with a question now u all wanna turn on me act like i am starting shit when u computer rambo wanna be( which u all have not clue what it means) try and make me look like i am starting shit get a fucking clue all three of u , if u keep going with this it is fine with me, it seems to me it is YOU all that like to keep this thread going so u can get the last word in and make your self feel good, , I will repeat this is a swinger site to meet friends and have fun not to fuck be stupid and bring death and shit the brings down the site, HAVE A GOOD DAY