One of the biggest questions asked in the swinging lifestyle is,
"How does a single male get into the lifestyle?" To be honest
there is no "easy" answer to this question. The truth is, the answer lies
almost 90% in luck. Here are a few tips that might help you in
your exploration of the swinging lifestyle though.
Before you, the single guy, try to make a leap into the swinger's
lifestyle, there are a few things that you should be aware of and consider,
many that most guys never think of. The first thing that you should realize
is that swinging is basically a couples activity. There has always been a
debate over whether single guys who do get into the lifestyle are actually
swingers or if they are just LUCKY. It all depends on their
perspective. Swinging is about the fulfilling and sharing of fantasies. If
you enter the lifestyle with the idea in your head that you are looking to
help others fulfill their fantasies while fulfilling your own, then yes, you may be
a swinger. If, however, you are attempting to enter the
lifestyle with only the thought that it's an easy way to get laid, not only
are you not a swinger but you are sadly mistaken.
As you are probably already aware it's not easy for a single guy to get
into the lifestyle; however, you might not be aware of the simple reason as
why. Go back to the earlier statement that swinging is mainly a couples
activity and it is about fulfilling fantasies. Yes, there are many couples
out there who have fantasies, which involve an extra male or 4 or 5 even.
However, for every couple out there looking to include males in their
playtime, there are at least 10 males looking to fill that one spot. So, as
you can see, you have some competition.
So how do you beat out the competition? There are two things that will
get you in the door the fastest; not every guy fits the description. What
are they? The first is a big cock. Of course size is relative, but with big
we are usually talking 8 inches or more long and/or 2" in diameter. The
other is if you are black, basically a lot of women have a fantasy about
doing a black man. For some it's the stereotype of the big black cock, for
others it's the thought of doing something taboo. There are probably as many
reasons as there are women. Whatever the reason, if you are black or have a
large cock your chances of getting into the lifestyle are much better than
average.
What if you don't fit in the above categories? All is not completely
lost. If you are a decent looking guy with good hygiene and a good
personality your chances are still pretty good. The key is really in your
attitude though. If you are simply looking to get laid that will show and it
will decrease your chances. If you are honestly looking to fulfill fantasies
both of your own and others and show that you are there as much for them as
for yourself you will do well.
Where do you start? There are two things you can do, the first would be
to post an ad, the second would be to search ads that are already out there
from couples seeking males and answer those that you qualify for. When
looking through ads that are already out there, read the ads carefully. Make
sure you understand what the couple is looking for and make sure that you
qualify. If they aren't seeking males, don't respond to the ad. If they are
only seeking black males and you are white don't assume that you are special
and just because you are nice they will want you. If you don't fit what they
are looking for don't respond to the ad.
When you do respond, don't just write an email or letter saying how much
you'd like to do the wife. Tell them about yourself, provide a good
description of who you are, what you look like and where you are coming from
(in regards to the lifestyle). If possible, include a g-rated full-body or
head shot photo. A g-rated photo that includes your face will get you a LOT
further than just a pic of your dick. Unless the couple requested a pic of
your dick, don't send it. Save the explicit pics for after you've talked
with them and they have asked for it.
Posting your own ad. Along with responding to ads that are already out
there, you might want to post your own ad. You should know though that with
the number of male seeking ads already out there you will probably have much
better luck responding to ads than posting your own, but don't let that keep
you from posting. Don't limit yourself to one site or magazine; post your ad
in as many places as possible to ensure that it is seen by as many people as
possible. Remember, not everyone surfs the same sites or reads the same
magazines.
When posting your ad, post as much information about yourself as
possible. Give a good description of yourself as well as good description of
the type of encounter you are looking for. Are you looking to get involved
with a couple long-term? Or, just a one-night fantasy fulfillment? Also,
provide a good idea of your location; If you live in a small town,
you might not want to state the name of your town, but at least include the
name of a larger town near you. If you are willing to travel, make that
clear. If you can host activities at your home, state that. Be honest in
your ad. If you are a married guy swinging without your wife be honest about
that fact. However, you must know that if you are a married guy swinging
without your wife and you do not have her consent to do so then you are NOT
swinging, you are cheating and most swingers will not look too kindly on
that. Remember, swinging is about honest and open relationships, not lying
and cheating. Don't forget the picture. When posting your own ad,
this might be a little iffy. Not everyone wants to post their face on the
net or in a magazine. Our suggestion here is to post a full-body shot with
your face blocked if you are worried about discretion. Then once you get a
response you can send them your face shot.
So, don't give up hope. If you really want to join the swinger lifestyle
you can. It might take some time, but as long as you keep a good attitude
and keep pluggin away you'll get there eventually.